Comparisons

Somewhere on this weary heart’s road back to God, I realized I had to stop with the comparisons.

Oh, I want her skin…

Oh, she’s so much more beautiful than me…

Oh, my boss likes her better than me…

Oh, they have so much money…

Oh, that person reminds me of so-and-so in my past who I never got along with…

Because when you compare yourself with others, you always lose.

And it makes you miserable.

But then there was the day I woke up and thought: Wait a second.

I want MY life.

I want MY batshit crazy clan.

And I want MY boo…

I woke up gasping like a beached whale and realized I couldn’t do without God, mercy, forgiveness, and plentiful redemption.

The word “vocation” means calling. It’s kind of like: Accumulated desires + life knowledge + love of God and direction of that love in a God-honoring way. Apparently I’ve always known mine.

It took me a long time to slow down and learn to pray: Lord, where are you calling me in this moment?

Then there’s the day you wake up and you’re like, OH WOW!

I want that covenant thing.

That me-n-him-n-God thing.

That holy-trinity-with-Jesus-in-the-middle-thing.

That til-death-do-us-part thing.